Review #593: 'The Octagon' (1980)

A film that could be easily summed up as simply ninja terrorists and the sexual allure of Chuck Norris' hairy mammoth-chest, The Octagon is a standard martial arts actioner, involving a conspiratorial group of, well, ninja terrorists. Chuck Norris is Scott James (although I was convinced after Norris stated his character name that he was in fact Scotch Eggs), a martial artist who stumbles upon the organisation that is secretly training a hard-core team of terrorists in a camp of unknown location. He has to infiltrate and bring down the clandestine operation before they begin "terrorising". I'm guessing that ninja terrorists would work ridiculously as they would waste all that time stealthily and silently getting into targets, only to make a whole lot of noise on their way out: it just seems reductive to me.

Of course Norris gets an entourage collected on his way. From Lee Van Cleef's mercenary to Art Hindle's young martial artist with a case of premature penetration (that's not supposed to be euphemistic), but of course, as suggested by the appearance of his fur covered chest, one flash of this (in almost any Norris vehicle) sends the women giddy. It seems that just previous to any final battle in the action genre of this period, the hero will use his visual tool (here, of course, the suspect, revealing chest), and the usually younger female character will throw herself at him sexually, a cliched catalyst that empowers the machismo of the hero into ultimate battle.

Whilst wholly generic, the acting is inevitably dull. In an early scene the trainees of the oriental organisation are being shown the fighting techniques of the ninja, scythes and swords are shown penetrating watermelons. One trainee says glibly, with the characteristics and delivery of a red-neck on his tenth bottle of moonshine: "It would be a lot better it they used real people". To which is relied with: "They will". For some bizarre reason, when I sit down to watch any late '70's or '80's standard action film, I seem to believe that I am going to enjoy it. That somehow these films are fun and exciting. However, every time I convince myself of this, the film I watch is so incredibly dull. Perhaps it is simply that my movie watching habits have changed since being a wide-eyed youngster, and that these films were always awful. Maybe I will re-watch one from my youth that I will enjoy... Here's hoping, but it ain't this one.


Directed by: Eric Karson
Starring: Chuck Norris, Karen Carlson, Lee Van Cleef, Art Hindle
Country: USA

Rating: *

Marc Ivamy